Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Out and About when Toilet Training....

"TOILET!" Demands Miss Two, her eyes light up in anticipation.

"Sure!" I smile, pleased our toilet training is making progress, even on these public outings.

We're in the Customer Lounge of the car dealership, waiting on our 1000kms service to be completed. Should only take half an hour, I'm assured by the Service Advisor. The door to the toilet is only steps away, at the back of the room.

We head in to the toilet, I sit her up on her throne. I stick my head out the door to keep an eye on my son, Mister Five, as he was content "quietly" playing with a few Duplo blocks. May I emphasize "quiet". Quiet meant not as loud or repetitive as usual.

Miss Two looks at me slyly.

"Finish!" she announces. I check. Nothing. Ok, false alarm. We get off, wash hands and meet back in the lounge area with her brother.

"MIIIIIINE!" Miss Two shrieks over a seemingly nondescript blue Duplo block. I wrestle with my choices. Get my son to give her the block, thus she gets her way (but we avoid WW3) and his fragile ego is subjected yet again to the fact his baby sister always gets her way, take the block away so no-one can have it (resulting in me being the "bad guy" and the only recourse by the children being incessant whining and "no fairs" until the item is either returned to be battled over like a chip on a beach by two seagulls or forgotten in my handbag until weeks later) or use the moment to teach the values of sharing and the rules of ownership to both children by giving the block back to Mister Five, allowing Miss Two to ask for it with her manners, and be gracious should Mister Five answer no.

"TOILET!!!!" I hear instead. Miss Two drops the block and races for the door at the back of the room again. Mister Five snatches up the block and returns to his play.

Once again, Miss Two sits on the toilet. I know at home, when she says she needs it, she needs it. I can sense this is one of those "I know there's a toilet here, and I want to see it... I also want to see if when I say jump you ask how high" moments.

After a small while, we're finished again, but with no real performance.

Back into the lounge. My complimentary Cappucino is ice cold, however I have become so accostomed to cold coffees, I regularly drop ice cream into mine at home to get the same effect.

Now there is a Snoopy Head (no body attached) being taunted at one another. I suggest Mister Five ignore the silly head and choose something else from the toy box. I notice more and more customers taking up the Courtesy Bus offer to drop them into town.

I catch up on old Brangelina goss. Lucky for me, I know the outcome, because they're at it again.

I have a list of words I hate.

Mine
No
Give it
Mu-uuum

This time it's a train Mister Two has built (quite cleverly) with some blocks and wheels. Miss Two is claiming ownership.

Once again though, "TOILET!!!" I hesitate. This is visit number three. What if this time she's for real and needs to go? I get up, a weary smile on my face, and march Miss Two off again.

Again nothing.

I wonder how long to go. It's been an hour already and the Service Advisor still hasn't popped in.

"Pack up time!" I cheerfully announce. This is met with groans and protests. I remind them they have plenty of toys at home to go back to play with.

I look at Miss Two. I suggest the toilet one last time before we get back into the car.

Again though, nothing.

We sign for our car and I buckle the children into their seats. Miss Two looks at me, smiles.

"Toilet?" She asks.

Of course.

Another word to add to my most hated list.